• Kirsty Penn

I Had the Wrong Mindset

I had to leave social media.

One day it just got too much. The constant stream of content causing my inner turmoil. It was my fault. I was constantly checking my feed, scrolling through endless posts and watching my notifications rise. It didn’t help that I had my own real-world stuff going on – This intensified everything!

Suddenly I was comparing myself to a stranger, their success fueled the doubts I already had about what I had and hadn’t accomplished in life.

If a friend posted happy news I was spitting envy. Not a great reflection to look at everyday. If I read something troubling my anxiety crept up a notch. Social media was killing my soul.

The worst part…I was allowing this to happen. I helped it along…everytime I logged online.

It had to stop! I hated who I was becoming and decided enough was enough.

I think my early school experience of bullying and being excluded from the ”cool gang”, played a tremendous part in this. When you have always been the outcast, you can develop unhealthy and unattractive qualities. Social media was just another playground I was miserable in.

In a desperate bid to save my sanity – I’m not being dramatic here, I went cold Turkey on the socials.

Gone were my Facebook troubles

No more Insta envy

Goodbye Twitter madness

Well, life continued and you know something? I learned it wasn’t all social media’s fault, nope I was forced to see myself and who I was becoming.

It took time for me to realise that it wasn’t the content on these platforms that was the problem. It was my thinking. I was pulled into impostor syndrome like any normal 21st Century woman with a childhood hangup.

I wish I knew then what I know now. Social media can be a rich resource for any business person but to survive in this social jungle you need some hardy skills.

It's possible to spend time online without losing your mind but if you have even a twinge of anxiety then you are going to have to face them or find a way to block out those triggers.

With the right mindset, you can create a successful presence online without the impostor tagging along. I did deep, inner soul searching work. Again, not being dramatic! Through working with several coaches, I was able to see past the posts, look into my past self and explore what was really messing with my head.

I found a good balance and now not only do I use Facebook and Instagram to run my business but also to spread mental health awareness.

I don’t spend hours scrolling through posts, instead, I am intentional about my time spent online.

The best part is that I like the reflection in that mirror now.


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